Being Smart = Work

I have two blogs, one for family and one for me. On my family blog I have a list of other blogs that I like to visit. On some of those blogs there are also lists of blogs that I also like to visit. Why don't I have them on my blog? I don't know. However, I know that many of those blogs post topics that really cause me to think and evaluate what I think and how I'm living my life. They are inspiring and seem so smart! I want a smart blog. I want to post deep, soul-searching, and insightful posts. I have all kinds of thoughts and articles running through my head all the time, but as soon as I begin to try and put my thoughts into words, they get all mixed up.

When I was in school, I could regurgitate all kinds of facts and opinions. I could argue with the best of them as long as I'd read enough to get a basic understanding of what was going on. I could turn in really great papers to my teachers, especially once I understood what it is they wanted in a good paper. Really, though, all I was doing was taking other people's words and thoughts and making them sound like they were my own. I'm now in a stage of life where I should be forming my own opinions and thoughts. A stage where I can learn from others words, but where I truly decide for myself what it is I believe and want. I'm not writing papers to be graded by a teacher. I'm not even writing articles for others to read to secure a job for myself. I am simply writing my thoughts, beliefs and experiences to strengthen myself and to possibly strengthen someone else. I also write to organize my thoughts and to maybe get advice from other like minded people.

Mostly lately, I feel like I've been wanting someone else to tell me what to do. I feel like asking for advice and having someone say "Do this" or "Do that" or "Don't do that". And yet, I know if some was to take over my life and tell me how to run it I would not like that in the least. So, instead of asking for advice all the time, I want to post insightful things I've learned, but first I have to learn them, or at least recognize that I've learned something, and that takes work. Lots of hard work.