Authentic Self

I've been reading this daybook lately. It has a little paragraph or though for each day, and today's was about your "authentic self". It asks the question "have you ever looked in the mirror and wondered who you were looking at? Is it not the person you expected to see?" When I was little I had this idea of what my life would be like when I grew up and got married. Of course you never can predict the future, but it gave me thought as to how closely that image is to where I am. For the most part, I'm right where I want to be. There were some things that I didn't get, I was going to marry someone who loved to sing and take me dancing, but Robert really doesn't like to do either of those things. He is better for me than anyone else I could have thought up, though. We don't always get what we ask for, but we get what we need. Anyway, that's off topic.

I was thinking about the movie The Notebook where the girl one day realizes she doesn't paint anymore and she loves painting. Sometimes we get so caught up in what we think we are supposed to be doing and how we think our lives are supposed to be going that we forget really who we are and what makes us happy. I love doing my crafts, and I won't give those up. I love being a girl and dressing up, I'm not going to pretend that I don't like dresses because those around me don't, I do. I enjoy solving problems, and I sometimes even enjoy math. I do not enjoy snow, but I do think it is beautiful, I just prefer to be inside and out of the cold.

I know that I'm not the woman that I want to be, yet. But I am enjoying discovering those things that make me happy and bring joy into my life. I know that as I am true to myself and strive to become the woman that God intends me to be I will be filled with more joy than I can imagine. I will have peace and love in my soul and I will be able to share that with others. Here's to the journey.